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DNF… I can’t… What on Earth just happened?!

There have been a couple of times in my life that I had to leave a book without finishing it. And it makes my heart ache and bleed, it really does…

Meredith is supposed to be a teenage girl that nobody understands and treat very well, who loses her amethyst ring and goes to a… magical land (?), the Land of the Lost, to retrieve it, with her dog, Pido, and a talking frog named Judge.

That was the main plot, more or less. If you want to know more, go read the blurb, I seriously can’t bring myself to analyze it right now concerning the cover description.

I’ve never found myself in a loss for words. And I don’t mean generally, stuff happens and I find it hard to post reviews due to being overhwelmed emotionally. But that’s when the book leaves me with some sort of emotionMyth of Amethyst leaves me with nothing. Nothing at all!

Unless you can count the extreme level of rage concerning just about everything, of course. That’s another matter.

Where to start? I wonder… Boy, it’s a one cupcake review, don’t blame me for the serious level of hating…

First, the world building. Can anyone spell “poor”? Too much detail some of the times, nothing but a few references at all some others. It was messy, at the very best. NO structure to make the Land of the Lost solid – and no, there’s no such thing as a fictional world with no physical laws and rules, even the weirdest fictional universes have those, it’s essential, otherwise, the reader feels like witnessing what happens to the main character, but with no actual background to base his/her imagination on. Unless you’re ready to make the reader feel as a part of the story – even when they’re just an observer – don’t make up a fictional world. This is basic knowledge!

Then, the characters. Ok, we don’t really have to like a main character for a story to be good. I have Karen Marie Moning’s Beyond the Highland Mist as a perfect example for this. I couldn’t stand the main couple, but the story was so good, I managed to make it to the end and with a 4-star rating to boost! This book here doesn’t even have that! Meredith is selfish, bratty (childish is an understatement), and rude – no, I don’t consider her lines sarcastic, they were simply rude, if it was me being talked to like that, I would have slapped her silly and made her go without dinner for two weeks, just so the little brat knew her place and learned to respect others.

She wasn’t what we know as a rebel teen. No, a teenage girl that rebels – in books, at least – has a reason to do so. Relatives are treating her badly, she has no friends, etc. Meredith didn’t have any of this. Her stepfather liked her, her mother spoiled her beyond reason, her brother treated her nicely, and her aunt was just a bit too strict, but nothing that would label her as the old hag Meredith always made her out to be. Her friend, Sarah, cared for her and wanted her company, wanted to spend time with her. And yet, Meredith feels misunderstood, and that no one treats her fair at all. Speaking like this to your aunt, just because she’s trying to teach you manners, kissing up to your brother, ditching your friend with a big fat lie just because her tastes are not the same as yours… I was a tomboy, too, in my school years, and I never treated others that way. If anyone was to see the list of traits above, they would see there is little to no character depth in Kaiserman’s main heroine.

No character depth and no actual world building show lack of research and serious work on behalf of the writer. There’s nothing worse than that. Even the plot had structure gaps. Nothing to hold a reader’s interest. Many have used what we know as “the Alice in Wonderland” basics. So, when you use a theme, a formula, a platform, that is so common, you make sure you work hard to turn it into something that will hold the reader’s attention, especially a seasoned one that has seen many plot formulas and can get bored easily.

I’m done with this at page 86, and I’m seriously not opening it again – it can stay there, on my shelf, simply decorating the place for the rest of eternity. I can’t believe I wasted my time reading this, when I could have started my newest Cornelia Funke purchase…

RATING:

cartoon-cupcake

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